I am dying. These are flat out brilliant! “Don’t toot! It might not be gas” is unreal. I bow to you and your husband. You guys are amazing! I’m doing these FOR SURE!!!! 🙂 🙂 Thank you!

Mom gets to say any embarrassing thing she wants about you in public! Let me show you how to play!

Cullen (19 years old this week) ticks me off for various reasons, but I withhold punishment until that perfect moment in front of his friends or total strangers in public. Example: “Cullen! Sweetie-cheeks!! Did you remember to flush the potty after you had the runs before we left?! It smelled soooo bad!!! Did you take your tummy medicine or do you need to poopy again?! Remember, don’t toot! It may not just be gas, honey!” Especially effective. Just the threat of me doing this gets me anything I want and lots of apologies!!!

Now Kieren is 10.5 years and a tough nut to crack! She is the Queen of Stoic Chinese! I sic her dad on her. He LOVES to put on his nasty old yard-work clothing and will take her out in public. Just the threat of Dad taking her to dance classes or to school dressed in ripped, stained, greasy, droopy pants and gross sweaty, stained, awful t-shirt with the embarrassing decal on the front will instantly change any tune from her! And Dad LOVES to play the football/baseball/basketball/talk-radio/old-fart music as loud as he can with the windows down! And he sings along too!!!!

I hope this gives you a few new ideas!